I was recently given the opportunity to work with a client on a sudden and unexpected career change (sound familiar anyone?). She emailed me moments after receiving notice that she would be laid off and, at that moment, was working on just breathing – nice strategy. For months she had been telling me how much she couldn’t stomach the climate she was working in and how she wanted to get out and do some independent consulting or something different. Apparently unwilling to make the transition herself, she was now in the place where the universe had decided for her.
Disaster or Opportunity?
When we met that evening, it was clear she was doing her best to hold it together; however her stress was bubbling from the inside-out. Her voice quaked with worry and the tension in her body was apparent, though she was clearly attempting to look calm and poised, caught, as she was, in the anxious grip of the Organizer. Her presentation would come as no surprise, knowing that Organizer is her Home pattern. But it didn’t have to be working against her. It is, after all, a useful pattern in crisis and the best place to start in sorting things out.
So…we talked a little about her current reality – savings, cash flow needs, low lying fruit/ opportunities for immediate transition, basic skills and network – so we could get grounded in what’s needed and what’s available in the present. It became clear that she had a few months to make this transition, though regrettably she’d have to dig into savings. Hey! Savings are meant for rainy days – and this was a time for her when it was certainly raining!
We then talked about the choices she had in perceiving the situation, knowing that how she defined it would determine its reality (for her) and her approach (in response to it). We tossed around three options, which I might roughly characterize as follows:
Option 1: “Oh My God! This is a disaster…I need cash now…and I’m willing to do anything short of taking my clothes off to get it.”
Option 2: “Okay, I just give up and I’m going to sell all my possessions and move to Nepal.”
Option 3: “Thank God! This is the opportunity I’ve been waiting for, and I should send a thank you note to my former employer for kicking my butt out the door because it’s forcing me to find the perfect career move, which I wouldn’t have done on my own!”
I’m sure there are other options, but among these, I’d go with option # 3 – how ‘bout you?
A Pattern Approach to Transitions
Now, it came out in our review of low-lying fruit that two job opportunities had floated across her inbox in just the past few hours (she was completely apathetic about one, and the other brightened her eyes a bit – either would pay the mortgage). It was also clear that these opportunities were NOT something she’d normally consider if the layoff hadn’t pushed her out the door. So we developed a transition plan based on the patterns…and the order of the patterns is important! Here is an outline of her plan and please use this as a basis of consideration / launching pad in developing your own:
1. First, take a DEFINED number of days – five-to-seven days seems ample and appropriate for your circumstances – to completely enter the VISIONARY: visiting places of wide open space and natural beauty (museums, the ocean, personal spaces of reflection and deep connection) and simply sitting with the present moment, giving yourself permission to do nothing. On some occasions, bring a pad of paper and pen and jot down ideas that come to you as you throw in questions like these:
- What does the world need right now and what can I contribute to fulfilling that need?
- What wants to happen in my life and what is my life telling me about the direction of my career?
- When I’m done with my career what do I want to have contributed, what do I want to leave behind?
- What is my most powerful reason – my WHY? That thing/value/belief which propels my decisions and actions? Is the WHY of my past still relevant going forward?
- What is shifting for me? What aspects of Who I Am want to be expressed through my life now?
Using COLLABORATOR in the Visionary Stage: Engage your Collaborator energy in this initial phase to do some fishing – put out as many lines of communication as possible to broaden your options, and resist the temptation to real in the first fish that bites! You might have drinks and dinner with your contacts but no official interviews! (Schedule those for AFTER this phase) Keep all lines of communication open, friendly and social. Ask questions that keep exploring who can help:
- When I’m in “xyz” town, who could I call up and go to dinner with?
- Who have I been too busy to visit lately and would visiting them now be worthwhile?
- Who else have I been out of touch with that I’d be interested in reconnecting with?
2. Next, take your best idea(s) that emerge from Visionary reflection (look at your pad of ideas) and make a DECISION – call upon the single point focus of the DRIVER - and put it in writing, make it real, state your commitment. Harness the Driver’s clarity to move from reflection into the world of ACTION! Here’s how…Ask yourself these questions:
- Of all the things I could do, what MUST I do right now? What’s most important?
- Among my talents and skills, which one or two are going to help me WIN now?
- Of all the possibilities in front of me, which am I most PASSIONATE about?
- Given my powerful WHY, what best achieves my mission in the most realistic, actionable way?
You now have your direction. And you don’t have to keep it a secret. You can also use your COLLABORATOR in the Drive Stage: The energy of the Collaborator will help you increase your clarity and commitment as you share it with others and leverage a team to move your mission forward. You might ask:
- Who can I share my commitment with to make it real and have them hold me accountable?
- Who could give me good advice on my new commitment and direction?
- Who in my network, or groups outside of my network, would be most interested in what I’m doing and how can I make those connections?
3. Third, with your powerful WHY lighting the way (Visionary), and the immediate target defined (Driver), create a plan of action for getting from here to there. Enlist the strength of your ORGANIZER and make a list. Prioritize and order your action steps in a clear way so you know what you must do today in order to see results tomorrow. Ask yourself these questions:
- How can I break this task down into a series of actions that take place on a timeline?
- What milestones can I define that will show me I’m making progress?
- What information and resources will help me get from here to there?
As in earlier steps, use your COLLABORATOR during the Organizer stage: This energy helps to make the plan more enjoyable and likely to be executed. You might ask:
- How can I make this planning fun, energizing and exciting?
- Who would want to help me in making sure I’m covering all the bases?
- When can I celebrate? (perhaps several times, come to think of it) Who can I invite?
4. As you can see above, it’s recommended that you keep your COLLABORATOR close by and often engaged. This is the energy that will make this time more fun, and keep you resilient, optimistic and bright. See the Collaborator notes above for integrating this energy through the process. Remember that the Collaborator makes connections and does it with a joyful, energetic spirit. The Collaborator writes emails like this:
“Hey Friend, Guess what? The best thing happened to me today! I was fired :-) I’ve been dying to get out of this position for months now and they did me the favor kicking me out – can you believe it?! Anyway, I’m spending a few days considering my options. Wanted to let you know I’m available and looking for opportunities that will be fun and make a great impact! Let me know if you see something. Lots of love!”
5. Finally, go back to the ORGANIZER and DRIVER and get it done! You’ve got your direction, you’ve got motivation (powerful WHY?), you’ve got your network engaged, you’ve got your plan ….now you just need to execute! Don’t get trapped in any one pattern for long though…use the pulse of push and recovery, the stretch and renew of alternating all 4 patterns to keep you energized. Go get em’! And by the way…I want to be invited to the party!
Retreating to the Wrong Pattern
A deliberate strategy that engages all 4 patterns and matches the right energy with the right task lets people find their power in difficult situations, and not get stuck in unproductive places. Many people would face the stress of being fired by retreating into a stuck version of their Home pattern, or force the situation by using the wrong energy at the wrong time.
For example, someone strong in the Driver might not allow him- or herself to let go for even a few days to explore Visionary possibilities. Any action may seem better than no action, no matter how blind it is: “I’ll give it till the end of the day, think of every possibility and then pick the best one and go after it.”
Right…that’ll work really well. Go with that strategy and I’ll cross my fingers that your epiphany comes at a scheduled time this afternoon.
A person stuck in the anxiety of the Organizer might not be able to embrace the Collaborator’s networking efforts: “I’m so embarrassed that I got laid off and I just can’t rely on anyone but myself. What I really need to do is perfect my resume and put it on as many job hunting web sites as possible, and hope nobody I know hears about my bad fortune and thinks poorly of me before I land another job.”
Yikes! Train Wreck ahead…Disaster awaits…Red Flag..Red Flag!!
Many people are getting laid off right now – and more to come. I have at least 3 people in my immediate network who have been asked to leave their jobs in the past week! The reality is that most of them will get scared, defensive, and retreat to a home pattern at its worst and/or use the Driver for survival as is our primal instinct to do so, rather than see this as an opportunity to unfold new potential. Happily, after this conversation, at least one person will act differently. If faced with a similar situation, I hope I act differently, I hope you act differently, and I hope we’re able to help our clients act differently …that we may all look back on the toughest transitions of our lives as our greatest moments of opening and expansion!
Enjoy!
